Sunday, August 9, 2009

the movie: GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra
the nitty gritty: 1) At what point when you are paying to go see a movie titled 'GI Joe' did you think you were going to see something profoundly Transformer 2?
2) Explosion, explosion, CGI, explosion, CGI, sci-fi, total suspension of the basic laws of physics (hey! ice floats, y'all!), explosion, 2 minutes of story and romance gone awry, explosion, danger: Paris, Moscow and DC.
3) Since Dale Dye must have been busy with The Pacific, I am sure the producers hired someone equally experienced with all things military, like, um, Michael Bay?
4) Hasbro was one of the producers, (keep that foremost in your mind when you consider how you invest your movie-going bux) and, finally,
5) If you are looking for a lot of (improbable) set-ups without all the nasty after taste of plot and all that stupid, emotional character development, but, rather, a simple, straight-forward vehicle-, landmark- and environmental-destruction- based actioner, look no further, you have GOT to see this one pronto. Go out right now and get a ticket.

Grading Session: 1.31 stars out of 5, mostly for the wardrobe. Gotta love those power suits.

Lessons Learned: Know your film-going needs, and don't get all hung up on probability. Fiction requires suspension of belief, some more so- and for far longer- than others. If this is not a problem for you, don't be so picky about the use of nano-bit technology (nor my spelling of same).

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